THE FREEDOM FILES
A blog by Dr Lara Corr
Lights on! What sets your heart on fire and why you're not doing it.
We get that flush of excitement when we think of something that sets our hearts on fire ... but then rarely act on it. What happens? How can we change our futures to match our yearnings?
This week I caught up with an old colleague from academia. She does great research but was growing bored of her topic and starting to think about what was next.
While we were chatting she went a little off topic and spoke about having recently remembered her passion for social justice through the great examples of Martin Luther King Jr and Malcolm X.
I got chills.
I pointed out what she just said (the conversation had since moved swiftly along) and you could see a light go on in her whole body. Like it was flooded with electricity.
Her subconscious had just thrown out an amazing clue of where she wanted to go.
Once that spark ignited, her mind was racing and a whole new range of possibilities were fighting for air time in her brain.
It was exciting, to say the least (I have chills again remembering it)!
She is a natural change-maker, drawn to helping professions, yet it seemed she had started reaching for smaller changes than the ones she really wanted to go for. Not to detract from the wonderful things she has achieved - she's awesome - it's more about where she wants to go and what she wants to do.
Later in the conversation she admitted reluctantly that she'd always thought that she had something 'big' to do in the world.
Have you also had that thought whisper through your mind? That you might be able to live with your heart on fire doing something 'big' in this world?
I bet you have.
So what happened?
Well, I bet that your little 'helper', the one inside us all always scanning for danger, shuts it down toute suite.
As most of you reading are likely to have your basic needs well and truly met and hopefully are not in physical danger, this hyper-vigilant part of us focuses on potential social danger.
Heaven knows, it doesn't want you to get on anyone's bad side by not doing exactly what you've been told growing up, or subtly by those around you now. How dare you have big plans or even worse, actually start making them happen! You might make someone feel bad or not be good enough!
That 'helper' panics when you get big ideas. It might be concerned that you're getting grandiose and too big for your boots.
Rest assured, that deep knowing you have about being able to do something 'big' is not about being grandiose.
The ideas attached to a deep knowing tend to have a different quality about them that isn't all about the ego but about following a compelling yearning (i.e. it's not about getting a super yacht or becoming a billionaire).
They are usually about:
...changing your world in some way - like knowing you can heal from intergenerational trauma and not pass it onto your children, becoming totally you, all the time, no matter what.
...changing the whole world (why not!)- fighting for a particular group in need, getting into politics, contributing to a cause, bringing a new product or piece of art to the world, or starting a revolution!
...meeting another type of soul dream, like achieving a great challenge or meeting a big goal, like climbing Mt Kilimanjaro, mastering an instrument or speaking a language fluently.
So, what are your yearnings, no matter how 'far fetched' they may seem?
Start dreaming and now notice how fast your brain is to dismiss them as ridiculous, too hard or to bring out the big guns... the shame tapes we ALL have in our minds*:
"Who do you think you are?"
and
"You're not good enough"
We ALL have these tapes. Are you going to take them for the Truth? Or will you choose to light your heart on fire anyway?
Go get em tigers!
Love,
Lara xx
*If you're interested in learning more about shame tapes read about the American social work scholar Dr Brene Brown - these tapes come from interviewing over 10,000 people about shame. It isn't just you ;)
Hi, I'm Dr Lara Corr, life coach and researcher in work and wellbeing. I coach successful 30 and 40 somethings who want more fulfilling or bigger careers but doubt themselves and their options. I help them get out of their own way, find direction and go for what they really want.
Find SET ME FREE on facebook
previous blog posts
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May 2024
- May 10, 2024 Where ADHDers shine or struggle as managers at work. May 10, 2024
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March 2023
- Mar 3, 2023 Work-life balance is never going to happen. Mar 3, 2023
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November 2022
- Nov 2, 2022 'Be realistic' is terrible advice for women. Nov 2, 2022
- Nov 2, 2022 Stuck on making a decision about your work-life? Nov 2, 2022
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February 2022
- Feb 24, 2022 What do you need today? Feb 24, 2022
- Feb 24, 2022 Increasing your confidence at work - starting today. Feb 24, 2022
- Feb 24, 2022 Do you need a time-management reset at work? Feb 24, 2022
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November 2021
- Nov 11, 2021 The feeling of 'not enough' at work. Nov 11, 2021
- Nov 11, 2021 Happiness fatigue at work Nov 11, 2021
- Nov 11, 2021 Get to know your patterns of procrastination (avoidance) at work Nov 11, 2021
- Nov 11, 2021 Parental burnout versus professional burnout Nov 11, 2021
- Nov 11, 2021 How to feel worthy of your dream job. Nov 11, 2021
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October 2021
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- Oct 22, 2021 What if you never feel like it? Oct 22, 2021
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September 2021
- Sep 30, 2021 An easy mistake that you might be making at work (and how to avoid it!). Sep 30, 2021
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June 2021
- Jun 27, 2021 Dealing with overwhelm at work. Jun 27, 2021
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June 2019
- Jun 4, 2019 Upset, frustrated or stressed at work? You MUST hear this. Jun 4, 2019
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May 2019
- May 21, 2019 What I learned from major burn out. May 21, 2019
- May 14, 2019 Thriving in your job while you're waiting to leave. May 14, 2019
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November 2018
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October 2018
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August 2018
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July 2018
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- Jul 18, 2018 Stop using self-criticism as motivation. Jul 18, 2018
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June 2018
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May 2018
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April 2018
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March 2018
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February 2018
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December 2017
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November 2017
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October 2017
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September 2017
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August 2017
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July 2017
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June 2017
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May 2017
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April 2017
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March 2017
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February 2017
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January 2017
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- Jan 12, 2017 Five things every workspace needs (especially if you hate your job) Jan 12, 2017
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- Jan 2, 2017 Dreading going back to work? Read this. Jan 2, 2017
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December 2016
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November 2016
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September 2016
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August 2016
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July 2016
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June 2016
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May 2016
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- May 28, 2016 Why I spent so much time online as a new mum and what I would do differently next time. May 28, 2016
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- May 18, 2016 How time online could make you happier May 18, 2016
- May 16, 2016 Does reading 'self-help' tips make you feel crap about your life? You're not alone. May 16, 2016
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April 2016
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