Joy signpost #2: What can't you shut up about?!

Hi everyone,

I'm writing this post from my hotel room in Amsterdam (happy dance) and today I want to talk about another way to identify your passions, joys – to what will make life that much sweeter, shinier and sparklier = awesome.

During the conference, I've met so many new people and gotten to know others better. 

The striking thing for me has been watching people come to life during conversations when they hit on their passions.

I love that point where someone's whole body language changes, their eyes sparkle, a grin flashes across their faces and their energy soars.

Everyone around them lifts. 

Although the conference delegates were there to talk about wellbeing at work, the conversations drifted towards other things fairly quickly. To what they REALLY loved talking about. To what you couldn't shut them up about (and I had no desire to!). 

Some of the hot topics were: travel, adventure, language, love, renovation shows, motorbike riding and super bike training, and all things woo woo.

Yes, this is all happening at an academic conference!

The moral of the story is: People cannot help but talk about things they love sooner or later.

So, what can't you shut up about?

Take a minute to go through your mind and find the last thing you really buzzed about and felt that energy to keep talking. Not in an anxious way, but in a radiant, warm glow kind of way. 

Follow the trail of breadcrumbs to joy!

What were you discussing? You might have held the floor while you waxed lyrical. You might have kept bringing the conversation back to the subject or felt deflated or annoyed that you didn't get to keep talking if you got cut off ;)

Like noticing what you love to check out online, noticing what you can't shut up about is a joy signpost, people! 

It's another way to identify what you get really excited about, what you could move towards to make life sweeter, more fulfilling and joyful. Woo!

You have this great signpost, so what are you going to do about it?

Are you making a plan to bring more of that joy into your life, or has your brain already kicked in with all the reasons you can't or shouldn't?

If this is the case, ask yourself why...

Is your passion not valued in society or perhaps considered frivolous or [insert derogatory word]?

Does it seem too hard to bring it into your life? 

Is it a shame tape playing? 'Who do you think you are?' or 'You're not good enough'?

Are you rejecting your passions because they don't fit with who you think you should be? 

Or is it simply that you can't be bothered, that you don't value or prioritise your own joy and happiness? (More thoughts to explore)

To bring your passions out into the open and to let joy run wild in your life, there are ultimately four steps (in no particular order). 

1. Accept yourself

2. Prioritise happiness

3. Problem-solve

4. Calm fear

It's as simple and as complicated as that, but trust me, you've got this! 

What's holding you back from living a life you glow about?

Talk about it with a friend or a coach (oh what? I'm a coach! No way, so handy*). 

Have a good one!

Lara xx

Hi, I'm Dr Lara Corr, life coach and researcher in work and wellbeing. I coach successful 30 and 40 somethings who want more fulfilling or bigger careers but doubt themselves and their options. I help them get out of their own way, find direction and go for what they really want.

Connect with me via Facebook and Instagram.

Five ways to find your passions, chase joy (and easily get out of your rut)

There's being in a rut and being in a groove and heaven knows we all feel the difference just reading that sentence.

Grooves feel good. Ruts do not.

But sometimes getting out of a rut feels like an impossibility and we are there, wading through molasses, truly wanting out but not seeing any way forward.

Being online, attached to your work emails or gaming most nights is a great example of being stuck in a rut. You might get a buzz every now and then with something interesting or amusing happens* but often you don't even want to be doing it.

It's just habit you've out grown - A RUT!

You're still on there because it's serving you to get an easy kick, to avoid boredom, to connect or to avoid feelings or situations you don't want to face.

That's okay, but you're reading this because that rut is feeling sucky.

It aint your friend no more.

One solution to getting out of a rut is to chase your joys like your life depends on it.

If you've been online and a bit numb to your everyday life, you might not know where to start.

Here's a few amazing kick starters to help you find your spark and chase that joy you've been missing out on. 

Grab a piece of paper and write down the answer to this (without thinking) for five minutes.

• I am happiest when I am..... with....
• If I could do anything I would....
• If I had a week off work/parenting I would...
• I day dream about getting back into... (what did you love doing that you stopped?)
• I know I'd love doing more... (what's working that you could do more of?)

Now, do three things.

1. Pick the one you can do this week and schedule it in. Tell everyone you're doing it. Get excited.
2. Read over your list and pick what makes your body charge up and spark. Start planning how you can make it happen.
3. Tell the voice in your head that is worried and afraid about everything AND thinks you can't do anything different (everyone has this) that it's all good, you got this.

Okay four things...

      4. Give yourself permission to have a happy life and go do something fun, however small.

Let me know how you go!

With love,
Lara

*By the way this variation of a reward is a key feature of addictive activities. They give you a buzz every so often, not every time, so you keep coming back (think about pokies/slot machines, scratchies etc).

Hi, I'm Dr Lara Corr, life coach and researcher in work and wellbeing. I coach successful 30 and 40 somethings who want more fulfilling or bigger careers but doubt themselves and their options. I help them get out of their own way, find direction and go for what they really want.

Connect with me via Facebook and Instagram.